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Communal
Prayer
Communal
Prayer: Is This My Minyan or All of Our's?
Rabbi
Elie Silverberg
Today is the Tenth of Tevet, one of the six fasts
we are commanded to undertake during the year. It
represents the date in the Jewish calendar on which
our enemies besieged Jerusalem. Eventually the walls
of Jerusalem were penetrated on the Seventeenth
of Tammuz and the Beit Hamikdash was destroyed on
the Ninth of Av.
Even though these latter two dates, the Seventeenth
of Tammuz and the Ninth of Av, each represent a
further progression in the destruction and hence
more severe events, in some ways I feel more saddened
by the Tenth of Tevet. One reason for this is that
we just finished Chanuka, which usually, and this
year was no exception, leaves me on a spiritual
high, feeling confident in the Hashgacha, the Divine
protection of Hashem for Klal Yisrael. To then be
reminded so soon of the tragic events leading to
the destruction of the Batei Mikdash leaves me with
the feeling - couldn't I have enjoyed my high just
a little longer?
Secondly, the Tenth of Tevet is the beginning of
the half of our year that culminates with the Ninth
of - it is the beginning of the mourning period,
the period that lead to the loss of the Beit Hamikdash,
of Yerushalayim, and of the long exile that we are
still experiencing.
However, being saddened does not mean being depressed.
Instead we should use the message of the day to
galvanize ourselves into action. I like very much
what Rabbi Leff said on Motzei Shabbat, that the
word "ra" (bad) is "eir" (waking) backwards - we
should view these days as wakeup calls. The Maharal
repeats many times that the greater the darkness
the greater the light that can later emerge. Indeed,
in our calendar year, Tisha b'Av , the day of exile
and the first day of Pesach, the day of great redemption,
come out on the same day of the week.
But what can we do? And quite frankly, are we really
responsible for all this? Bnei Yisrael of those
generations were so bad until Hashem finally lost
patience and destroyed the Beit Hamikdash. They
got what they deserved. We're not perfect, but we're
a lot better than that, aren't we?
No we're not. The Gemara Yoma in Talmud Yerushalmi
says the following incredible statement, "Any generation
that did not have the Beit Hamikdash built in its
time, it is as if it was destroyed in that generation!!"
If we were better than the generation of the destruction,
the Beit Hamikdash would have been rebuilt already!!
Well, why are we destroying the Beit Hamikdash?
What exactly is our terrible sin or sins? It seems
to me that the simplest approach to this is that
if we are still 'destroying' the Beit Hamikdash,
we must be perpetuating the sin or sins that lead
to its actual destruction!! And it makes the most
sense to look at events of the second Beit Hamikdash,
since the first exile was relatively short, while
the second one is still ongoing. We are told by
Chazal that the first Beit Hamikdash was destroyed
because of idolatry, sexual immorality, and murder;
whereas the second destruction came about because
of "sinat chinam," needless hatred.
What can we do? Well, as was said Motzei Shabbat,
the first thing is to look inwards and not try to
point the finger at someone else. Let us look at
ourselves as individuals and as a tzibur - a congregation
here at Yeshivat Darche Noam/Shapell's. Even among
fine people there is always room to improve.
I believe that part of the problem is that we don't
appreciate what sinat chinam is and what forms it
can take. I believe there is an element of sinat
chinam in any situation where your focus is only
on your needs and does not take enough into account
the needs of your fellow man.
One area which I have observed this year, where
I feel we as a community could improve, is the area
of Tefilla B'tzibur, communal prayer. Not the prayer,
but specifically the emphasis on the tzibur, the
communal aspect. I 've heard a number of assorted
complaints about our morning minyan. The davening
is too fast, too slow, too loud, too quiet, too
unemotional, too this, and too that. These are not
new complaints - the Gemara in Berakhot tells the
story of a congregation that came to the Rav to
complain about a shliach tzibur, a cantor, who they
said davened too slowly. The Rav responded, "Surely
he's no slower than Moshe Rabbeinu, who took forty
days and forty nights to pray on behalf of Klal
Yisrael!" Then another day they came to the Rav
to complain about a shliach tzibur who davened too
quickly. The Rav responded, "Surely he's not quicker
than Moshe Rabeinu, who on behalf of his sister
prayed, "Keil na refa na la (G-d please heal her,
please)," a total of 5 words!! His point being that
it's not the davening that's too long or short,
it's that it's too long, short, loud, quiet, etc.
for me. Mirror, mirror, on the wall - who davens
best of all? And I believe this type of focus, even
when it relates to spiritual needs, is a form of
sinat chinam. My needs come first.
Now, to be fair, many who have complained to me,
have usually added the admission that the problem
is with them, and they are probably right. But at
some point something must be done. And I don't mean
davening at the bubble!! Because, at the risk of
bursting your bubble, the Torah says "Lo titgodedu,"
you should not break up into factions. I believe
that too is a form of sinat chinam - instead of
dealing with a problem head-on, run away from it!
Well, that solves nothing, except to explain the
high divorce rate in the Western world. Don't work
things out but go your own way.
Note: finding a minyan where everyone davens at
your speed, at your volume, your nuances or lack
of nuances, is not real Tefilla B'tzibur, it's cloning.
The most real Tefilla B'tzibur is where the only
thing you share with the other daveners is that
you are all involved in tefilla, i.e you are only
a tzibur because of your common goal of tefilla!
We know that when you have Tefilla Btzibur, there
are extra things added to the tefilla - kadish,
kedusha, barchu, modim, etc. Why is that? Perhaps,
because accomplishing anything difficult deserves
a reward. In reality, tefilla is a very private
thing - you are talking to Hashem -- pleading, thanking,
praising - all in your individual way. For everyone
there is a personal way of doing so most effectively,
ranging from being solemn to wild gesticulations,
from hushed tones to loudly pouring out your heart.
To get ten or more Jews to daven together under
these circumstances deserves a reward!!
How can you daven effectively and not be bothered
by the fact that other guy davens too slow/fast/loudly/quietly?
The answer, I believe, and the remedy is simply
to remember that you are not the center of the universe,
but Hashem is. From that perspective, the tefilla
of your fellow Jew should be as important to you
as your own. You should, respect that he has more
insight than you do as to how he best gets that
tefilla across. Indeed, this idea of the centrality
of Hashem and not of the individual was one of the
main ideas represented by the Beit Hamikdash. Three
times a year Bnei Yisrael had to leave behind their
homes, their jobs, and their egos and all come together
as Klal Yisrael, as a tzibur coming to collectively
do their Avodat Hashem.
Indeed, let us put ourselves back to the times of
Shlomo Hamelekh and similar times where some one
million Jews converged on the Beit Hamikdash - what
a "balagan," what a mess! Believe you me there were
Jews then also - each individual had their personal
style and approach to the avodah. Yet in Pirkei
Avot it tells us an amazing thing, even though they
were crowded while standing, they had ample room
when they bowed down. The reality was that it was
tremendously crowded, but when they bowed down,
when they made Hashem their focus, there was suddenly
room for everyone, each one with his or her own
approach.
This was the zenith of achdut, of unity and a necessary
element for the functioning of the Beit Hamikdash.
I wish to offer a chidush. We are told by Chazal
that the first Beit Hamikdash was destroyed because
of idolatry, sexual immorality, and murder, whereas
the second Beit Hamikdash was destroyed by needless
hatred. The first exile lasted only seventy years,
whereas the second exile is about two thousand years
and counting. Why this tremendous difference? Is
sinat chinam so much worse than the threesome of
avodah zara, gilui arayot, and shefikhat damim?
I wish to suggest that the reason for this imbalance
is because the first Beit Hamikdash was destroyed
as a punishment for doing such evil sins. Bnei Yisrael
had to be punished and shaken up in a very real
way and nothing does this as effectively as galut,
exile. But punishment is finite and once seventy
years had passed, Bnei Yisrael had paid their dues
and it was now time to restart and rebuild.
I wish to suggest that the reason for this imbalance
is because the first Beit Hamikdash was destroyed
as a punishment for doing such evil sins. Bnei Yisrael
had to be punished and shaken up in a very real
way and nothing does this as effectively as galut,
exile. But punishment is finite and once seventy
years had passed, Bnei Yisrael had paid their dues
and it was now time to restart and rebuild.
But the destruction of the second Beit Hamikdash
was not a punishment per se. As I said before, the
Beit Hamikdash represented our focus on Hashem,
on the avodah of Klal Yisrael, on the need and ability
to look beyond our differences to a higher common
goal. Sinat chinam is the antithesis of all that
the Beit Hamikdash stood for. Therefore the Beit
Hamikdash can simply not exist where there is an
atmosphere of sinat chinam. It would be like a fish
out of water. Hence the Beit Hamikdash cannot be
rebuilt until we rid our atmosphere of the poison
of sinat chinam. The moment we can do this, the
Beit Hamikdash will immediately reappear!!
Tefilla is what replaced the sacrifices. Instead
of sacrifices we have avoda b'lev, service of the
heart, i.e. tefilla. The direction of our tefilla,
wherever we may be in the world, is towards the
Beit Hamikdash. There is no place for sinat chinam
in any venue of our society, but it is especially
destructive in the area of tefilla.
The Chafetz Chaim is to have said, "When I was a
young man, my goal was to change the world; when
I reached middle age I modified that to changing
my village; when I reached old age I modified that
to changing myself." I wish to interpret these words
as not that he gave up hope, but rather that he
realized that the way to change the world is to
change oneself!
This is the day to start to reverse the trend, right
here, right now. If Hashem sees our tzibur davening
together, with different styles but k'ish echad
b'leiv echad (as one man with one heart), as it
says by Har Sinai, we can hope Hashem will look
down and say, if they can do it, maybe the time
has come to try this again on a much larger scale.
May this be Hashem's Will. |
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