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Alumnae
Midreshet Rachel v'Chaya alumnae:
Staying connected
with each other
and with staff members. Strong friendships develop at
Midreshet Rachel v'Chaya and last. Connections with staff
members are long term; their educational role as a life-long
one. To help keep up connections
there are periodic alumni gatherings, including a yearly
Melave Malka, alumni
reunions in England and California.
The Darche Noam office sends out a monthly Darche
Noam Alumni Bulletin through email and maintains an Alumni
Home Page on our website, including a Photo
Gallery to keep up with simchas and alumni events.
Building Jewish families and communities
Students learn the beauty of Jewish family life and the
responsibility to contribute to the Jewish community.
We teach the paramount importance of Jewish education,
both in the classroom and through our faculty role models.
A significant number of Midreshet Rachel v'Chaya alumnae also
take on leadership roles in the Jewish community, contributing
to synagogues, Jewish organizations, and working as Jewish
educators.
The following letter paints a picture of the transformation
from student to alumna.
Letter from an alumna
Dear Rabbi Shurin,
I rushed off to America without depositing a thank you
note in your MR mailbox. I apologize. Here it is, via
email.
Surprisingly, I grew at a much slower pace at Midreshet
Rachel than I had expected. And really, learning wasn’t
as intense as I had envisioned. Everyday, I came to school
and I was just me — the person I had always been — and
I happened to be learning Torah. As a result, I never
once went into mental shock!
I ended up asking myself quite frequently — Why am I giving
up so much to be here? My savings account will be gone
by year’s end, I’ll have more debt, more fights with my
parents, more trouble getting into the work world, more
transitions and changes, more of everything!. What for?
Nobody is making me stay. Yet every time I asked myself
this question, I would think about the text I had learned
that day or the chesed of my teachers and fellow classmates
or I would consider the way the different ideas/philosophies
expressed themselves in the world.
Rather than be told -- this is the right way or that is
the right way, I often had to deduce it for myself based
on the evidence provided. As a result of doing this personal
research, I felt more empowered and accomplished in my
religious journey. I was forced to be an active participant
in my learning rather than a passive one.
The “ideal way” was rarely presented. Of course, this
frustrated many of us. But what I realized is that given
our current society and the individual backgrounds of
balei teshuva, the “ideal way” is not always feasible.
In fact, to be taught only the ideal end point can prove
overwhelming. At one point (before Midreshet Rachel),
I contracted what I referred to as the“Tzaddik complex.”
In order to a be a true, observant Jew, loved by G-d,
I was obliged to take on the whole Torah at once, give
up everything related to my previous, non-religious life
and become a full-fledged tzaddekus. When I realized the
difficulty of this task, I became depressed and resentful
and was no longer able to recognize my own strengths (because
compared to a true Tzaddik, I wasn’t much).
I believe I was able to grow this year because I did not
feel this pressure. I saw my past as a potential asset;
I saw that striving for greatness is not a competitive
sport, judged objectively. Instead, it is a very personal
and subjective journey. While I realize that there are
objective truths and ideals, it is my own process sometimes
that matters most. In addition to this revelation, I also
gained the skills to better understand Torah discussions
and the ability to listen to lectures with a more discriminating
ear. My questions, as a result, (I think) improved and
the answers in return became more complex.
But perhaps the most important thing I learned from you
is that spiritual growth rests in my own hands. I discovered
that many of my issues with Judaism have nothing at all
to do with Judaism; rather they derive from flaws in myself.
I recognize now how essential learning mussar and improving
oneself is to growth in mitzvot and coming closer to G-d.
For me, this was an important revelation.
I regret that I didn’t “nudge” you more this year with
questions. Maybe, subconsciously, I wasn’t yet ready to
be bound to your answers. I now feel that nudging a Rabbi
is the only way I’m going to grow further. (Hopefully,
I’ll find someone here and will only bother you once in
awhile!)
Thank you R’ Shurin for giving so much of yourself to
us (students) and for giving me a clearer perspective
on Judaism. I feel stronger and more passionate about
Judaism than ever before (despite the lack of “song and
dance!”). And while I’m a little depressed to be back,
I feel sufficiently equipped to deal with the challenges
of life in America (at least until I return to Israel!).
Thanks for everything.
With gratitude,
Tara Knel |
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