Remembering
Darche Noam Institutions 14th Annual Alumni Melave Malka
by Michael Rose (alumnus from 1995, 1999-2001)

Chairs, tables and partitions are removed; exotic floral arrangements, delectable pies and fruit and vegetable platters transform the Shapells Beit Medrash and Cheder Ochel into a banquet hall for the evening; guests exchange hugs and baby pictures to the musical accompaniment of Rabbi Yehuda Schnall on organ.

It is Parshat Vayechi, December 25th, 1999, and the 14th Annual Darche Noam Institutions Alumni Melave Malka, featuring Chief Rabbi Yisroel Meir Lau, has begun. Although Rav Lau is the star attraction, those who come with hopes of catching up with friends they haven't seen in months, or in some cases, even years, aren't disappointed. Alumni in attendance span the entire history of DN/MR, from David Schwartz ('78), now teaching music therapy and yoga, to Shapell's most recent alumnus, Shlomo Somerstein ('99), continuing his Torah learning at Medrash Shmuel. At over 260 guests, including such luminaries as HaGaon HaRav Natan Kamenetsky and frequent Shapell's speaker Rav Natan Lopez Cardozo, this year's Melave Malka is the most well attended in Darche Noam history.

Rav Karlinsky introduces Rabbi Lau as a new grandfather, setting the tone for the evening's theme - "The Jewish Family: Where We Have Been, Where We Are Going." Stately in black hat and coat, the Chief Rabbi goes on to deliver an inspiring, charming and mesmerizing D'var Torah on the three influences which have the greatest effect on a child's development - family, society and education.

As the Chief Rabbi is speaking, one is struck immediately by remarks made earlier in the evening by Rav Karlinsky regarding the educational philosophy of Shapells: "The message of balance is one of most important messages that Darche Noam Institutions has been trying to educate towards, which is really the source of the unity that enables us to get together in this room - alumni, students, and of course Rebbeim, who span every ideological perspective in the Torah world, who are involved in every profession, who are making a contribution to the Jewish people in every way... Everyone knows that Darche Noam Institutions teaches texts, we teach you how to learn, but all of you also know that to really succeed in Torah Judaism, it's good Midot, it's leadership, it's Mesirat Nefesh, it's Yirat Shamayim, this is where it really happens."

After, looking around the room, seeing how each person has grown through their time at Darche Noam, it is easy to see the parallel in Rav Lau's remarks to Shapells and its students, both past and present: The Rebbeim and fellow talmidim are the family, who have educated us and enabled us to enter society with a firm base in Torah; a family to rely on and remain close to; a society unto itself.

Amidst the goodbyes, Master of Ceremonies Doron Kornbluth echoes the thoughts of many: "I consider myself privileged to have learned at Shapells... not a week goes by when I am not in contact with one or another of the Shapells Rebbeim." In case anyone missed the connection, Doron drives it home with his closing words: "Stay involved," he tells us, "stay connected." These are your roots, this is your family.

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